UNIVERSAL DONOR: MA VIE EN CROUTE
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Universal Donor
We can ill afford another Klendathu You are just a number to me! And that number is: PAGES UD MADE: My Books Page My Reviews Page My Reference Page My Music Page My Pictures My Store UD-RELATED PAGES: My LiveJournal My MySpace music page My Flickr page My del.icio.us page My Last.fm page My Amazon Wishlist HEAVY ROTATION Dan Deacon: Bromst Animal Collective: Merriweather Post Pavillion Bon Iver: For Emma, Forever Ago Vampire Weekend: Vampire Weekend Fleet Foxes: Fleet Foxes BLOGS ETC claude le monde nuncstans rock 'em stock 'em tomato nation postmodern drunkard tuckova 22 ghastly mess constintina total virility fuzzysquid drunken bee stacey nightmare elyse from ANTM stereolabrat dark side points jf_franklin 123 i love you READ NOW brotherhood 2.0 NOT BLOGS ETC qwantz (dinosaur comix) go fug yourself the burg cat and girl book of ratings married to the sea icanhascheezburger fire joe morgan fivethirtyeight.com READ NOW hospitality on parade WEIRD LOVE dead amusement pks craters! all content © 2002-2010 Jeremy Broomfield
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Thursday, July 18, 2002
I don't understand how people can have sex in the summer. I'm not talking the kind of "summer" they have in Canada or England. I'm talking Brooklyn in August, broken air conditioner, film of liquid covering your whole body, might-as-well-grow-gills-because-there's-more-water-in-the-air-than-there-is-air summer.
I mean it, though. Sex in the summer? What a ridiculous idea. The last thing I want to do in the summer is exercise. (Well, actually, exercise is the last thing I want to do, ever. In fact, it probably will be the last thing I do; if I ever step on a treadmill my heart will explode like a soggy, gore-filled piñata.) I hate sweating, and I just don't understand the point. Sure, sex feels good, but does it really feel that good? It couldn't possibly. But here's the weird part: I have definitely had sex during the summer. In fact, I think I've LOTS of sex during summers. What the HELL was I thinking? I guess that's the whole point: I wasn't thinking. I think maybe there's something primal that takes over where sex is involved; something that overrides common sense. Hmm. Interesting theory -- it would certainly explain some of the stinking, toothless hobos Pussy Willow drags home from the street to satisfy her summertime urges. Ha! I guess that's why they call it "heat," right? 0 comments |
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MY IMAGINARY GIRLFRIENDS Chan Marshall Rotem of the IDF Eleanor Friedberger Amy Goodman Bernardine Dohrn ('69) Maya Rudolph Joanna Newsom Imogen Heap Caroline Dhavernas Shana Rae Ray DISALLOWED FOREVER "I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you!" - "from whence" - "...the exception that proves the rule" - any use of the question "spit or swallow?" - the phrase "drop trou" - fake-o reviewer verbs: "penned" for wrote "helmed" for directed "lensed" for whatever - "expat" - the euphemism "passed away" - pronouncing merci beaucoup as "mercy buckets!" (see also: "grassy-ass!") PET PEEVES "confinscated" - trying children "as adults" - "drownded" - misuse of reflexive pronouns, as when someone says "Please talk to Bob or myself." Come on people now. "Myself" is not just a fancy version of "me"! LEARN IT. - tattoos in the Courier font - any use of Comic Sans |