UNIVERSAL DONOR: MA VIE EN CROUTE
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Universal Donor
We can ill afford another Klendathu You are just a number to me! And that number is: PAGES UD MADE: My Books Page My Reviews Page My Reference Page My Music Page My Pictures My Store UD-RELATED PAGES: My LiveJournal My MySpace music page My Flickr page My del.icio.us page My Last.fm page My Amazon Wishlist HEAVY ROTATION Dan Deacon: Bromst Animal Collective: Merriweather Post Pavillion Bon Iver: For Emma, Forever Ago Vampire Weekend: Vampire Weekend Fleet Foxes: Fleet Foxes BLOGS ETC claude le monde nuncstans rock 'em stock 'em tomato nation postmodern drunkard tuckova 22 ghastly mess constintina total virility fuzzysquid drunken bee stacey nightmare elyse from ANTM stereolabrat dark side points jf_franklin 123 i love you READ NOW brotherhood 2.0 NOT BLOGS ETC qwantz (dinosaur comix) go fug yourself the burg cat and girl book of ratings married to the sea icanhascheezburger fire joe morgan fivethirtyeight.com READ NOW hospitality on parade WEIRD LOVE dead amusement pks craters! all content © 2002-2010 Jeremy Broomfield
Hosted by: HostRocket.Com Comments by: YACCS SITE STATS PRAISE & REVIEWS "[UD] is a genius." --Christian Oates "[Claudia] is fucking awesome, and [UD] is a genius. And vice versa. You should all buy Fear Not." --Tricia Howey MOTTO egeo huic vigorum MY WRESTLING NAME Titan Gently MY PUNK NAME Razor Ection
WHO LINKS TO UD? • from Technorati • from Google • from Yahoo and here's something weird: my place in Humor 3-space |
Wednesday, August 21, 2002
Have you ever noticed that it's impossible to find a comfortable and stylish pair of sneakers? It's always one or the other.
Have you ever noticed that Kitty Pryde (aka Shadowcat) of the X-Men never got older? She's probably still fifteen years old. Have you ever noticed how fucking sexy I am? How when I walk into a room, my presence attracts attention like a carrier group attracts kamikaze pilots? How even the music seems to change its tempo? Can you hear the underclothes dampening? Because I can. Have you ever noticed that sludge that leaks out of fast-food dumpsters? Dude. It's totally gross. Have you ever noticed that Alpha Flight, one of Marvel Comics' superhero teams from the 80's, not only included a midget and a paraplegic, but were from Canada? As if. Have you ever noticed the way zombies will climb any number of stairs to get to fresh brains? So the roof is not a safe place to run to. (Unless you have a jetpack, which you don't, because anyone with half a rat's brain can see that a jetpack would fry your damn legs off.) I recommend a fast vehicle instead; it is easy to outrun zombies in a car. But watch out when you stop to get gas, because they may be waiting behind the pump. Have you ever noticed how left-handed people are always crying about how it's a rightie's world and nothing is made for them? Have you ever wanted to slap them across the face with an open pair of left-handed scissors? Because if you have, you should get some serious psychiatric help -- that's a pretty violent urge, there, buddy. Why don't you just chill the fuck out? 0 comments |
OTHER REVIEWS: Scrabble NEW! LATEST BOOK REVIEWS: The Game Moneyball One-Upsmanship Siddhartha You need the Fear Not Guide to Life. Buy it already. ($4) Now available! The Broomfield Variations CD ($10) or go to The UD Store
MY IMAGINARY GIRLFRIENDS Chan Marshall Rotem of the IDF Eleanor Friedberger Amy Goodman Bernardine Dohrn ('69) Maya Rudolph Joanna Newsom Imogen Heap Caroline Dhavernas Shana Rae Ray DISALLOWED FOREVER "I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you!" - "from whence" - "...the exception that proves the rule" - any use of the question "spit or swallow?" - the phrase "drop trou" - fake-o reviewer verbs: "penned" for wrote "helmed" for directed "lensed" for whatever - "expat" - the euphemism "passed away" - pronouncing merci beaucoup as "mercy buckets!" (see also: "grassy-ass!") PET PEEVES "confinscated" - trying children "as adults" - "drownded" - misuse of reflexive pronouns, as when someone says "Please talk to Bob or myself." Come on people now. "Myself" is not just a fancy version of "me"! LEARN IT. - tattoos in the Courier font - any use of Comic Sans |