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You are just a number
to me! And that number
is:

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PAGES UD MADE:

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My Books Page

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My Reviews Page

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My Reference Page

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My Music Page

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My Pictures

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My Store

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UD-RELATED PAGES:

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My LiveJournal

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My MySpace music page

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My Flickr page

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My del.icio.us page

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My Last.fm page

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My Amazon Wishlist

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HEAVY ROTATION

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Dan Deacon:
Bromst
Animal Collective:
Merriweather Post Pavillion
Bon Iver:
For Emma, Forever Ago
Vampire Weekend:
Vampire Weekend
Fleet Foxes:
Fleet Foxes

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BLOGS ETC

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claude le monde
nuncstans
rock 'em stock 'em
tomato nation
postmodern drunkard
tuckova 22
ghastly mess
constintina
total virility
fuzzysquid
drunken bee
stacey nightmare
elyse from ANTM
stereolabrat
dark side points
jf_franklin
123 i love you READ NOW
brotherhood 2.0

NOT BLOGS ETC

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qwantz (dinosaur comix)
go fug yourself
the burg
cat and girl
book of ratings
married to the sea
icanhascheezburger
fire joe morgan
fivethirtyeight.com
READ NOW
hospitality on parade

WEIRD LOVE

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dead amusement pks
craters!

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all content
© 2002-2010
Jeremy Broomfield

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PRAISE & REVIEWS

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"[UD] is a genius."
--Christian Oates

"[Claudia] is fucking awesome, and [UD] is a genius. And vice versa. You should all buy Fear Not."
--Tricia Howey



MOTTO

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egeo huic vigorum

MY WRESTLING NAME

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Titan Gently

MY PUNK NAME

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Razor Ection







WHO LINKS TO UD?

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• from Technorati
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and here's something
weird: my place
in Humor 3-space

  You don't need me to tell you to vote, because you already did, right? It's so easy. You just go to your polling place, and talk to an idiot to find out which election district you're in. I'm in Election District 49, Assembly District 51, Congressional District 12, State Senatorial District 20, Council District 38, and Civil Court District 01. Or at least, I was in those districts before a tornado of redistricting swept me into an entirely novel superimposition of theoretical polygons. Damn, now I have to come up with a whole new mnemonic device to remember that shit. Easy peasy!
     Anyway, my polling place is a drafty church. So this morning, Table of Idiots #1 sends me to the IdioTable for my new Election District, which is 3, apparently. Whatever. I try in vain to help Table of Subidiots find my name in the book, but the alphabet is a bunch of extraterrestrial runes to my TableOfIdiocy, whose main skills seem to be reclining at odd angles and bitching about the draftiness of the church. (Though in all fairness I should point out that they are exceedingly skilled at both these things.) I can see my manic, loopy signature in the book from ten paces, and I helpfully point out that they can stop turning pages. There is some weird, depression-era paperwork to fill out, and then I get to wait in line. I ask for a cookie, and they look at me like I'm strange, maybe because there are no cookies anywhere. I wait some more. I don't blame the person in front of me for taking a long time with her choices, because the ballot was obviously designed by a joint venture of MK Ultra and The Parallax Corporation, by which I mean it is designed to make even the sanest person volunteer for shock treatment. But luckily I'm a supergenius, so I figure it out and ker-chunk I am done fulfilling my most joyous civic duty.
     But what about the morons? What about you? Well, I only hope you didn't vote for the Right To Life candidate just because you liked the little picture of the fetus. Vote! Exercize your will! Power to the Peepholes! Imagine the possibilititties!
posted by Universal Donor 4:14 PM 0 comments

OTHER REVIEWS:
Scrabble NEW!

LATEST BOOK REVIEWS:
The Game
Moneyball
One-Upsmanship
Siddhartha

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You need the
Fear Not Guide to Life.
Buy it already. ($4)

Now available!
The Broomfield Variations CD
($10)

or go to The UD Store

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MY IMAGINARY GIRLFRIENDS

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Chan Marshall
Rotem of the IDF
Eleanor Friedberger
Amy Goodman
Bernardine Dohrn ('69)
Maya Rudolph
Joanna Newsom
Imogen Heap
Caroline Dhavernas

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Shana Rae Ray

DISALLOWED FOREVER

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"I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you!"
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"from whence"
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"...the exception that proves the rule"
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any use of the question "spit or swallow?"
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the phrase "drop trou"
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fake-o reviewer verbs:
"penned" for wrote
"helmed" for directed
"lensed" for whatever
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"expat"
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the euphemism
"passed away"
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pronouncing merci beaucoup as "mercy buckets!"
(see also: "grassy-ass!")

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PET PEEVES

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"confinscated"
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trying children "as adults"
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"drownded"
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misuse of reflexive pronouns, as when someone says "Please talk to Bob or myself." Come on people now. "Myself" is not just a fancy version of "me"! LEARN IT.
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tattoos in the Courier font
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any use of Comic Sans

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