Universal Donor
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You are just a number
to me! And that number
is:

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PAGES UD MADE:

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My Books Page

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My Reviews Page

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My Reference Page

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My Music Page

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My Pictures

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My Store

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UD-RELATED PAGES:

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My LiveJournal

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My MySpace music page

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My Flickr page

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My del.icio.us page

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My Last.fm page

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My Amazon Wishlist

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HEAVY ROTATION

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Dan Deacon:
Bromst
Animal Collective:
Merriweather Post Pavillion
Bon Iver:
For Emma, Forever Ago
Vampire Weekend:
Vampire Weekend
Fleet Foxes:
Fleet Foxes

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BLOGS ETC

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claude le monde
nuncstans
rock 'em stock 'em
tomato nation
postmodern drunkard
tuckova 22
ghastly mess
constintina
total virility
fuzzysquid
drunken bee
stacey nightmare
elyse from ANTM
stereolabrat
dark side points
jf_franklin
123 i love you READ NOW
brotherhood 2.0

NOT BLOGS ETC

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qwantz (dinosaur comix)
go fug yourself
the burg
cat and girl
book of ratings
married to the sea
icanhascheezburger
fire joe morgan
fivethirtyeight.com
READ NOW
hospitality on parade

WEIRD LOVE

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dead amusement pks
craters!

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all content
© 2002-2010
Jeremy Broomfield

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PRAISE & REVIEWS

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"[UD] is a genius."
--Christian Oates

"[Claudia] is fucking awesome, and [UD] is a genius. And vice versa. You should all buy Fear Not."
--Tricia Howey



MOTTO

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egeo huic vigorum

MY WRESTLING NAME

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Titan Gently

MY PUNK NAME

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Razor Ection







WHO LINKS TO UD?

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• from Technorati
• from Google
• from Yahoo



and here's something
weird: my place
in Humor 3-space

  I was going to write a self-indulgent rant about actors and oversensitive people, but my precious readers have too many unanswered zombie questions. This blog is no place for self-indulgence. It is, first and foremost, a public service: a clearinghouse for zombie information.
Q: Is it better to be eaten by one of the living dead or by a cannibal?
A: The reader who posed this question came up with a whole bunch of reasons it could be asked with a straight face. But come on now. I think he just wants to hear me rant a bit. Fine. OF COURSE it's better to be eaten by a cannibal! Jesus Fuck, have I taught you nothing? The life of a zombie is one of endless hunger and agony, quelled only momentarily by the ingestion of live flesh, which has a tendency to run away, adding frustration to your list of posthumous woes. If a cannibal eats you, your legacy might be embarrassing, but you won't care -- you're dead. Being dead is cool as key lime pie. Being undead is as sucky as a Hanoi prostitute. Your "zombie-like" experience with benzos and bourbon was a labor day picnic, my friend. Why do you think I spend so much time educating you on zombie behavior -- so you can find the most polite way to expose your tender headflesh to the first approaching fiend? No! Duct tape a crowbar to your hand! Keep a cocked, loaded sniper rifle in the corner of every room! Install motion detectors in a mile-wide perimeter around your isolated mountaintop retreat! Invite a convention of cannibals to your house and smear yourself with steak sauce, but for god's sake DO NOT LET A ZOMBIE BITE YOU, EVER.
posted by Universal Donor 3:33 PM 0 comments

OTHER REVIEWS:
Scrabble NEW!

LATEST BOOK REVIEWS:
The Game
Moneyball
One-Upsmanship
Siddhartha

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You need the
Fear Not Guide to Life.
Buy it already. ($4)

Now available!
The Broomfield Variations CD
($10)

or go to The UD Store

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MY IMAGINARY GIRLFRIENDS

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Chan Marshall
Rotem of the IDF
Eleanor Friedberger
Amy Goodman
Bernardine Dohrn ('69)
Maya Rudolph
Joanna Newsom
Imogen Heap
Caroline Dhavernas

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Shana Rae Ray

DISALLOWED FOREVER

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"I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you!"
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"from whence"
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"...the exception that proves the rule"
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any use of the question "spit or swallow?"
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the phrase "drop trou"
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fake-o reviewer verbs:
"penned" for wrote
"helmed" for directed
"lensed" for whatever
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"expat"
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the euphemism
"passed away"
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pronouncing merci beaucoup as "mercy buckets!"
(see also: "grassy-ass!")

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PET PEEVES

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"confinscated"
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trying children "as adults"
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"drownded"
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misuse of reflexive pronouns, as when someone says "Please talk to Bob or myself." Come on people now. "Myself" is not just a fancy version of "me"! LEARN IT.
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tattoos in the Courier font
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any use of Comic Sans

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