Universal Donor
We can ill afford
another Klendathu

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You are just a number
to me! And that number
is:

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PAGES UD MADE:

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My Books Page

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My Reviews Page

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My Reference Page

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My Music Page

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My Pictures

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My Store

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UD-RELATED PAGES:

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My LiveJournal

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My MySpace music page

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My Flickr page

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My del.icio.us page

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My Last.fm page

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My Amazon Wishlist

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HEAVY ROTATION

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Dan Deacon:
Bromst
Animal Collective:
Merriweather Post Pavillion
Bon Iver:
For Emma, Forever Ago
Vampire Weekend:
Vampire Weekend
Fleet Foxes:
Fleet Foxes

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BLOGS ETC

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claude le monde
nuncstans
rock 'em stock 'em
tomato nation
postmodern drunkard
tuckova 22
ghastly mess
constintina
total virility
fuzzysquid
drunken bee
stacey nightmare
elyse from ANTM
stereolabrat
dark side points
jf_franklin
123 i love you READ NOW
brotherhood 2.0

NOT BLOGS ETC

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qwantz (dinosaur comix)
go fug yourself
the burg
cat and girl
book of ratings
married to the sea
icanhascheezburger
fire joe morgan
fivethirtyeight.com
READ NOW
hospitality on parade

WEIRD LOVE

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dead amusement pks
craters!

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all content
© 2002-2010
Jeremy Broomfield

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PRAISE & REVIEWS

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"[UD] is a genius."
--Christian Oates

"[Claudia] is fucking awesome, and [UD] is a genius. And vice versa. You should all buy Fear Not."
--Tricia Howey



MOTTO

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egeo huic vigorum

MY WRESTLING NAME

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Titan Gently

MY PUNK NAME

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Razor Ection







WHO LINKS TO UD?

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• from Technorati
• from Google
• from Yahoo



and here's something
weird: my place
in Humor 3-space

  The terrorists have struck. Sometime on Sunday, they detonated an enormous bomb filled with sinister white powder, causing anxiety, chills, and paralysis. Blanketed in this organic agent, the city came to a standstill. Grown men wept. Babies exploded. Zombies ate brains. I didn't have to go to work. Women rent their garments and begged me to help them propagate the species. I was like "what species?" but it was too late -- the propagation had begun.
     I hate having the day off. Why not just give me a cocktail of Valium, Demerol, and Seconal in a solution of Everclear? I could probably accomplish more. Even if we weren't at Severe Dangerous Icy Condition Terror Warning Threat Level of Brightest Twinkling Orange, I would still be completely useless on a sudden homebound day off. What am I gonna do? Wash the dishes? Nope, did that on stupid Sunday. Take out the trash? What trash, bitch? I throw everything directly out the window into the courtyard, which is where we're supposed to put our garbage bags anyway; I'm just cuttin' out some middlemen -- and saving the planet to boot! Soap operas suck so hard, man, they could suck Jesus' balls dry, and he had some pendulous, jizz-filled sacks. Why should I even bother getting out of bed, except to put some sterile dressings on my bedsores and flop back under the covers for a few more hours of precious, precious unconsciousness?
     Goddamn fucking glaargle! You are a bunch of panicky stupid idiots! Get off your stupid fucksuck asses and go to work! Can't you lift your fagtarded feet an extra six inches per step? IT'S WATER, PEOPLE. WATER WATER WATER WATER WATER WATER WATER. Shitty fuck shit!
posted by Universal Donor 2:33 PM 0 comments

OTHER REVIEWS:
Scrabble NEW!

LATEST BOOK REVIEWS:
The Game
Moneyball
One-Upsmanship
Siddhartha

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You need the
Fear Not Guide to Life.
Buy it already. ($4)

Now available!
The Broomfield Variations CD
($10)

or go to The UD Store

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MY IMAGINARY GIRLFRIENDS

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Chan Marshall
Rotem of the IDF
Eleanor Friedberger
Amy Goodman
Bernardine Dohrn ('69)
Maya Rudolph
Joanna Newsom
Imogen Heap
Caroline Dhavernas

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Shana Rae Ray

DISALLOWED FOREVER

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"I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you!"
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"from whence"
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"...the exception that proves the rule"
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any use of the question "spit or swallow?"
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the phrase "drop trou"
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fake-o reviewer verbs:
"penned" for wrote
"helmed" for directed
"lensed" for whatever
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"expat"
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the euphemism
"passed away"
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pronouncing merci beaucoup as "mercy buckets!"
(see also: "grassy-ass!")

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PET PEEVES

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"confinscated"
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trying children "as adults"
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"drownded"
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misuse of reflexive pronouns, as when someone says "Please talk to Bob or myself." Come on people now. "Myself" is not just a fancy version of "me"! LEARN IT.
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tattoos in the Courier font
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any use of Comic Sans

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