UNIVERSAL DONOR: MA VIE EN CROUTE
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Universal Donor
We can ill afford another Klendathu You are just a number to me! And that number is: PAGES UD MADE: My Books Page My Reviews Page My Reference Page My Music Page My Pictures My Store UD-RELATED PAGES: My LiveJournal My MySpace music page My Flickr page My del.icio.us page My Last.fm page My Amazon Wishlist HEAVY ROTATION Dan Deacon: Bromst Animal Collective: Merriweather Post Pavillion Bon Iver: For Emma, Forever Ago Vampire Weekend: Vampire Weekend Fleet Foxes: Fleet Foxes BLOGS ETC claude le monde nuncstans rock 'em stock 'em tomato nation postmodern drunkard tuckova 22 ghastly mess constintina total virility fuzzysquid drunken bee stacey nightmare elyse from ANTM stereolabrat dark side points jf_franklin 123 i love you READ NOW brotherhood 2.0 NOT BLOGS ETC qwantz (dinosaur comix) go fug yourself the burg cat and girl book of ratings married to the sea icanhascheezburger fire joe morgan fivethirtyeight.com READ NOW hospitality on parade WEIRD LOVE dead amusement pks craters! all content © 2002-2010 Jeremy Broomfield
Hosted by: HostRocket.Com Comments by: YACCS SITE STATS PRAISE & REVIEWS "[UD] is a genius." --Christian Oates "[Claudia] is fucking awesome, and [UD] is a genius. And vice versa. You should all buy Fear Not." --Tricia Howey MOTTO egeo huic vigorum MY WRESTLING NAME Titan Gently MY PUNK NAME Razor Ection
WHO LINKS TO UD? • from Technorati • from Google • from Yahoo and here's something weird: my place in Humor 3-space |
Thursday, June 12, 2003
Wow, you can almost hear the simultaneous throb of a billion Friendster addicts' temple-veins as the servers that have supported (or supplanted) their social lives become overloaded by the sheer volume of percolating geek hormones, as profiles turn to 404s and digital hourglasses fail to fill. Gregor must be having an embolism.
Meanwhile, in the real world, I'm pissed at TimeWarnerMonopoloCable for fucking with my shit. Pussy Willow was rainy-Sunday bored and cruising the Movies On Demand channel for some entertainment. She was like "ooh, is Y Tu Mamá También good?" and I was like "only if you like watching incredibly sexy movies about hot young Mexican boys," and she was like "Um, hel-lo," and I was like "exactly," and I recommended she drape a blanket over her crotch so she could masturbate while viewing without feeling all self-conscious about it. Well, fuck TWMC. They said on the purchase screen that it was the unrated version, but goddamn if they didn't excise an entire hot scene from the first five minutes. And without spoiling anything for you, I have to say that they cut something from a pivotal end scene that pretty much makes it a different fucking movie. If you've seen the real cut, you know what I'm talking about. I got a refund by bitching out some customer support rep and acting all nancy about the integrity of the art and how dare they contribute to the PMRC/Blockbusterification of the world, and blah blah blah look at me I'm a big artfag-cakes. But please send Time Warner a soggy bag of hot shit. Did I tell you that I once rented John Woo's The Killer from Blockbuster and they had edited out most of the killing? Damn. It's like they have a crew of monkeys with scissors up in that joint's HQ. Fa shizzle. I'm in Maine til Tuesday, folks, so bug Gregor about taking up the posting slack. His email address is right over there. 0 comments |
OTHER REVIEWS: Scrabble NEW! LATEST BOOK REVIEWS: The Game Moneyball One-Upsmanship Siddhartha You need the Fear Not Guide to Life. Buy it already. ($4) Now available! The Broomfield Variations CD ($10) or go to The UD Store
MY IMAGINARY GIRLFRIENDS Chan Marshall Rotem of the IDF Eleanor Friedberger Amy Goodman Bernardine Dohrn ('69) Maya Rudolph Joanna Newsom Imogen Heap Caroline Dhavernas Shana Rae Ray DISALLOWED FOREVER "I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you!" - "from whence" - "...the exception that proves the rule" - any use of the question "spit or swallow?" - the phrase "drop trou" - fake-o reviewer verbs: "penned" for wrote "helmed" for directed "lensed" for whatever - "expat" - the euphemism "passed away" - pronouncing merci beaucoup as "mercy buckets!" (see also: "grassy-ass!") PET PEEVES "confinscated" - trying children "as adults" - "drownded" - misuse of reflexive pronouns, as when someone says "Please talk to Bob or myself." Come on people now. "Myself" is not just a fancy version of "me"! LEARN IT. - tattoos in the Courier font - any use of Comic Sans |