UNIVERSAL DONOR: MA VIE EN CROUTE
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You are just a number to me! And that number is: PAGES UD MADE: My Books Page My Reviews Page My Reference Page My Music Page My Pictures My Store UD-RELATED PAGES: My LiveJournal My MySpace music page My Flickr page My del.icio.us page My Last.fm page My Amazon Wishlist HEAVY ROTATION Dan Deacon: Bromst Animal Collective: Merriweather Post Pavillion Bon Iver: For Emma, Forever Ago Vampire Weekend: Vampire Weekend Fleet Foxes: Fleet Foxes BLOGS ETC claude le monde nuncstans rock 'em stock 'em tomato nation postmodern drunkard tuckova 22 ghastly mess constintina total virility fuzzysquid drunken bee stacey nightmare elyse from ANTM stereolabrat dark side points jf_franklin 123 i love you READ NOW brotherhood 2.0 NOT BLOGS ETC qwantz (dinosaur comix) go fug yourself the burg cat and girl book of ratings married to the sea icanhascheezburger fire joe morgan fivethirtyeight.com READ NOW hospitality on parade WEIRD LOVE dead amusement pks craters! all content © 2002-2010 Jeremy Broomfield 
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Monday, December 08, 2003
On SNL this weekend, I was happy to see Paris Hilton appear for real during Update to play double entendre tennis with Jimmy Fallon around the fact there is a hotel called the Paris Hilton, Jimmy saying "I'm very famous and I may have to come in the back door of the Paris Hilton" and after asking if the hotel has ballrooms, "I'd love to have my balls held by the Paris Hilton." Stupid jokes, but they're so charming, the two of them (and so young!), and though the gist was that she was saying no way could he ever "get into" the Paris Hilton, the delightful frisson of the bit came from the fact that you knew that HELL YES Jimmy Fallon could fuck Paris Hilton, and probably did, right there under the desk when they went to commercial.
During Alias last night (which is as addictive as crack but better for your heart because you don't have to go to deserted streets in bad neighborhoods late at night to watch it with gun-wielding drug dealer scum), I saw a ridiculous advertisement from our friends at Eli Lilly. A woman, supposedly afflicted with ADD, sits at a conference table, having trouble concentrating as her mind slips from thought to thought. The ad is intended to scare the pants off you, and it's shot like the trailer for The Ring, with bursts of static and flickery ghost imagery, rapid fire shots of kids, birds, stores, and a guy in a bunny suit. What the fuck? Should I be worried about having ADD, or that I'm totally fucking psychotic? Bunny suit? Like where in real life do you actually see a bunny suit? There was a bunny mask in that preview for Cabin Fever, which is another thing this ad looks like, and there was a campy bunny mascot for Crunch gyms for a while, before they switched to their misspelled (or at best nonstandard) "No Judgements" campaign. I have ADD (or as they're calling it now "Adult ADD," which sounds a whole lot sexier!), and I rarely picture guys in bunny suits during meetings. I picture death by paper cuts, stuff like that, but no bunnies. I'm not even the thousandth person to point out the retardation of advertising prescription drugs directly to consumers, but there's something really ballsy and evil about this ad, and it will usher in even more egregious affronts to decency. Like "if you haven't asked your doctor about Flammerval, YOUR CHILDREN MAY BE EATEN BY ZOMBIES. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon, and for the rest of their lives. Beware the bunnies who want to keep you from your Flammerval. Common side-effects include testicle dessication and explosive diarrhea." And the weird part is, Lilly doesn't make Ritalin or Adderall, the two drugs used most often to treat ADD and ADHD. They make this new shit called -- I shit you not -- Strattera. Apparently it's not a stimulant. Where's the fun in that? It's just a boring old selective norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor. Yawn. I don't know about you, but without the orange firecracker warning sticker, I don't really believe a pill will help me. 0 comments |
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MY IMAGINARY GIRLFRIENDS Chan Marshall Rotem of the IDF Eleanor Friedberger Amy Goodman Bernardine Dohrn ('69) Maya Rudolph Joanna Newsom Imogen Heap Caroline Dhavernas Shana Rae Ray DISALLOWED FOREVER "I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you!" - "from whence" - "...the exception that proves the rule" - any use of the question "spit or swallow?" - the phrase "drop trou" - fake-o reviewer verbs: "penned" for wrote "helmed" for directed "lensed" for whatever - "expat" - the euphemism "passed away" - pronouncing merci beaucoup as "mercy buckets!" (see also: "grassy-ass!") PET PEEVES "confinscated" - trying children "as adults" - "drownded" - misuse of reflexive pronouns, as when someone says "Please talk to Bob or myself." Come on people now. "Myself" is not just a fancy version of "me"! LEARN IT. - tattoos in the Courier font - any use of Comic Sans |