Universal Donor
We can ill afford
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You are just a number
to me! And that number
is:

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PAGES UD MADE:

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My Books Page

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My Reviews Page

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My Reference Page

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My Music Page

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My Pictures

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My Store

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UD-RELATED PAGES:

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My LiveJournal

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My MySpace music page

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My Flickr page

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My del.icio.us page

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My Last.fm page

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My Amazon Wishlist

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HEAVY ROTATION

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Dan Deacon:
Bromst
Animal Collective:
Merriweather Post Pavillion
Bon Iver:
For Emma, Forever Ago
Vampire Weekend:
Vampire Weekend
Fleet Foxes:
Fleet Foxes

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BLOGS ETC

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claude le monde
nuncstans
rock 'em stock 'em
tomato nation
postmodern drunkard
tuckova 22
ghastly mess
constintina
total virility
fuzzysquid
drunken bee
stacey nightmare
elyse from ANTM
stereolabrat
dark side points
jf_franklin
123 i love you READ NOW
brotherhood 2.0

NOT BLOGS ETC

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qwantz (dinosaur comix)
go fug yourself
the burg
cat and girl
book of ratings
married to the sea
icanhascheezburger
fire joe morgan
fivethirtyeight.com
READ NOW
hospitality on parade

WEIRD LOVE

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dead amusement pks
craters!

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all content
© 2002-2010
Jeremy Broomfield

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PRAISE & REVIEWS

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"[UD] is a genius."
--Christian Oates

"[Claudia] is fucking awesome, and [UD] is a genius. And vice versa. You should all buy Fear Not."
--Tricia Howey



MOTTO

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egeo huic vigorum

MY WRESTLING NAME

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Titan Gently

MY PUNK NAME

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Razor Ection







WHO LINKS TO UD?

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• from Technorati
• from Google
• from Yahoo



and here's something
weird: my place
in Humor 3-space

  I'm really "ramping up" the whitetrashifiction of my lifestyle. First it was the sweatpants which I used to own as a joke, but somehow more recently I find my self wearing them without any ironic purpose at all. Then when I needed a comfortable piece of furniture for the living room, I opted for a loveseaty couch thing -- that reclines. A double recliner. Hoo boy. Then, as I mentioned a few weeks ago, I succumbed to Ron Popeil's leathery pitch, and I'm now the proud owner of TV knives. This trend disturbs me. I am more comfortable, and I can slice things easier, but I as long as I don't like Kid Rock or Jeff Foxworthy, I think I can keep my City Slicker Card. Yee-hah!
     Oof. If I were a bad stand-up comic, that would be the start of my act.
     You ever stop and think about the white stuff inside an Oreo? No? Good. DON'T DO IT. I always start thinking about after I've shoved like five home-made double-stufs down my stupid throat. It's got to be like Crisco and confectioner's sugar, right? Oh disgusting.
     The following is a line from the Spice Girls song "Spice Up Your Life," which is featured in the climax of the movie Spice World, which I luckily caught on some HBO channel:"Yellow man in / Timbuktu / Color for both / me and you / Kung Fu Fighting / Dancing Queen / Tribal spaceman / and all that's in between."
     So put aside for a moment, if you can, the utter retardation of the complete lyric. Bad lyrics are fine with me. No, I'm bothered by the fact that nowhere along the production line -- nowhere at all, from writing, through arranging, rehearsing, recording, and eventual release -- did they encounter anyone who knew where fucking Timbuktu is. Not one single solitary geographically educated soul who knew that Timbuktu is in Africa, in Mali to be precise, and hence is fairly short on "yellow men" -- assuming of course that the term "yellow man" here is the traditionally offensive imperialist term for East Asians. Which... yes, yes it is. Which makes you wonder further: if they had said "yellow man in / [insert East Asian city here]" would it have been any better?
     The L.A. River, (that concrete monstrosity, the trapezoidal cutaway featured so heavily in movies like Terminator 2, Grease, and Point Break), usually bears ironic moniker with jolly aplomb. What now? That shit is flooded, B! The L.A. River flows again! No more ironicker moniker! And yet I can't find a single picture of the dampened waterway. Anybody help a brother out? This is like Halley's Comet in terms of rarity.
     Finally, to close out this terrible abortion of a post, here is a quote that demonstrates why I love allmusic.com:

The [Iveys'] new name, Badfinger, came from the working title of the Beatles song "With a Little Help From My Friends," "Bad Finger Boogie." It beat out such suggestions as the Glass Onion and the Prix (which came from John Lennon, who surely hoped it would be mispronounced frequently).

Hee.
posted by Universal Donor 1:32 PM 0 comments

OTHER REVIEWS:
Scrabble NEW!

LATEST BOOK REVIEWS:
The Game
Moneyball
One-Upsmanship
Siddhartha

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You need the
Fear Not Guide to Life.
Buy it already. ($4)

Now available!
The Broomfield Variations CD
($10)

or go to The UD Store

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MY IMAGINARY GIRLFRIENDS

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Chan Marshall
Rotem of the IDF
Eleanor Friedberger
Amy Goodman
Bernardine Dohrn ('69)
Maya Rudolph
Joanna Newsom
Imogen Heap
Caroline Dhavernas

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Shana Rae Ray

DISALLOWED FOREVER

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"I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you!"
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"from whence"
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"...the exception that proves the rule"
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any use of the question "spit or swallow?"
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the phrase "drop trou"
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fake-o reviewer verbs:
"penned" for wrote
"helmed" for directed
"lensed" for whatever
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"expat"
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the euphemism
"passed away"
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pronouncing merci beaucoup as "mercy buckets!"
(see also: "grassy-ass!")

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PET PEEVES

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"confinscated"
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trying children "as adults"
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"drownded"
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misuse of reflexive pronouns, as when someone says "Please talk to Bob or myself." Come on people now. "Myself" is not just a fancy version of "me"! LEARN IT.
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tattoos in the Courier font
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any use of Comic Sans

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